While I am someone who is all about special treatment especially in the form of gifts like freebies, swag bags and bonuses. I've never been someone who gets them by playing on someone else's guilt. Even when it might be appropriate to do so. I've also never in my life played "the race card" or the "woman card". Sure racism and sexism exist, but my theory is that if I don't set myself up to be a victim of that BS then that greatly minimizes the chances of it happening to me. Not saying that hasn't happened to me, and when it has in the infinite wisdom and profoundness of In Living Color's Homey D. Clown, "Homey don't play that!"
But at 33 weeks pregnant with sore swollen feet the size of Andre the Giant's I don't give a damn about making someone be nice to me or give me something to remedy my discomfort.
Sometimes, like when I'm in the subway I subtly start to rub my belly. Which because I'm still not that big has prompted more than one person to ask me if I had a stomach ache. (Please see my blog entry: I'm Not Fat I'm Pregnant!". I then say politely, "No, I'm not sick, I'm 7 months pregnant." They usually react with surprise and then say something along the lines of "Wow- you look really good for being pregnant." While my outside voice smiles and says in the innocent Southern drawl I can pull up instantaneously "Oh, thank you. That's so sweet!" My inner voice, the New Yorker of the past 15 years says, "Yeah, yeah yeah! Now will you please get your fat ass up and give me your seat- in fact I could use the entire row so that I can put my Fred Flintstone looking feet up."
What I used to think of as cheating, like going to the front of the line, is now more acceptable to me now that I'm in this "more fragile" state. And if I was back in SoCal right now and I had a handicapped sign to hang from my rear view mirror I WOULD! Without ANY guilt if it meant I was closer to my destination. I don't feel this makes me a bad person. Just a person who for the first time in her life is putting her and her baby's needs before those of others. I've never done that before.
So what I'm really saying ladies- is that you're only pregnant for 9 months. And while it is an awesome incredible miraculous time in your like it can also be miserable on several levels so you milk that special treatment for all you can Girlfriend! 'Cause before you know it it's gonna be over!
The Art of the "Almighty Contradiction" is alive and well People! I will explain what I mean in a second.
As someone who spends a great deal of time in Southern California- especially the Greater Los Angeles area, I'm not going to lie, one of the best parts about being married or ina relationship here is that you have another person who helps you get from point A to point B a little faster- well at least when you're in the car. That's because much like the standard 2-drink minimum at a comedy club you now meet the 2-person minimum for the HOV lane (or High Occupancy Vehicle lane). My husband, CJ, swears that's why I married him. That and because at 6 feet 4 inches- an entire foot taller than me- he can reach the really high schtuff off of our kitchen shelves.
While those are clearly not the ONLY reasons I married my darlinghusband I do count them among the bonuses. And I would think being prego would afford me the same kind of bonuses. (I broached that topic a couple of months ago in another entry- Pregnancy Bonuses- Say What?)
Classic example- I LOVE LOVE LOVE that I get special "expectantmother" parking @ BabiesRUs. (It's awesome! It's kind of like handicap parking cause you get to park right there near the front of the store.)
I, however, believe the same sort of courtesy should be extended to me when it's just me & Baby Bean in the car ALL THE TIME but esp. when I'm on the highway- not wanting to be stuck in s#!tty SoCal traffic.
Here's my incredibly logical reasoning for this. Were you to ask any of my good Fundamentalist God-fearing Christian friends about it and I should have been able to coast in the HOV lane the day after my husband & I "did the deed". 'Cause according to them I've technically got 2 people in the car when it's just little 'ol prego me right now.
But heck at 28 weeks even my Pro-Choicer friends would have to agreethere's another living active person in there! So why then does the state of Californ-IA- deny me the right to drive in the HOV lane pregnant?!
Does that not reek of hypocrisy?! Is that not a huge slap in the faceto all pregos in urban areas? Bad lawmakers! Bad!
