Welcome back to my latest installment of Green-eyed Monster Mondays: Who I'm Jealous of Today & Why. Today the honors go to people with clogged sinuses or those who've completely lost their sense of smell aka sufferers of anosmia. (Don't get me wrong I feel badly for the latter, because I know their food doesn't taste as good but I'm still a little jealous right now.) That's because right now I have the sniffer of a freakin' hound dog. If I were on a K-9 unit I could solve every crime with my schnoz in record time. I would be lead detective of the Bloodhound Gang (from the show 3-2-1- Contact not the band.) At this exact point in my pregnancy my sense of smell is like some sort of sick super hero power. Some of y'all may be thinking, but Karith that's so fantastic! Um, yeah it would be if the only scents one had to inhale was vanilla and cinnamon.
Unfortunately, unless you're camped out at the mall 24/7 in front of a Cinnabon that ain't how the real world smells. Case in point, I just had the joy of air travel for better part of the day-it was two-plane day with a connection through Dallas/Ft.Worth airport. Y'all there's nothing like having SUPER smelling and being in a closed in space with recycled air that will make you wish for the first time in your life that you had a sinus infection. I could smell who'd had a cigarette right before coming into the airport. I could detect who's Right Guard had made a left turn. I knew who'd had bourbon and Coke for lunch and who'd eaten barbeque and too many beans the night before. I was in a tornado of disgustingness. I don't even think disgustingness is a real word- but I just made it one 'cause that was hell I was in.
And, while I've always secretly wanted a super power I was hoping it would come in the form of telepathy or invisibility- something I could use to a) my advantage and b) to help make the world a better place. Knowing from 100 feet away who needs to brush their teeth and scrape their tongue is NOT what I signed up for.