Wednesday, July 25, 2012

"Do You Have Sharp Pains In Your Vagina Yet?"

That is the question most asked to me by several friends in the past 48 hours. My first response was, "Um, WHAT?!!" Then when I asked them to repeat the question to be sure I wasn't hearing things I said, "Why was I not told of this earlier?"...Well that answer is simple. If women knew EXACTLY what the physical side effects of being pregnant was the Earth's population would have ceased to exist centuries ago and none of us would be here- I wouldn't be writing this blog and you sure as sugar wouldn't be reading it. My last question on this topic is, "Is there a strong enough Midol prescription to cope with this?!"

If like with prescription drugs someone was to seriously list what actually happens to you when you get knocked up it would read something like: 

Getting pregnant may lead to swelling- not just of your belly, but your feet, hands, fingers and toes. Other side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, constipation, not fitting into your favorite clothes, crying for absolutely no reason whatsoever, unbelievable heartburn, insomnia, anxiety, feelings of "what the fuck am I going to do-ness",  backpain, sciatica, and lastly shooting pains in your vagina!

To be honest I'm not sure if knowing this ahead of time would have prevented me or millions of others from diving head first into motherhood. I mean this is something I've dreamed of since I was a little girl. But I would have definitely had some second thoughts. I've got a decent tolerance for pain, but there are some places you'd rather not hurt- am I right ladies?

So far the shooting pain in my Garden of Eden has not happened yet, but now that I know about it I'm waiting. Just like when you find out from a friend that a character in a book dies- you're wincing with every page turn when it starts to get ominous.

Let's all just keep a positive attitude that even if/when the pain does occur it passes quickly. And it's not something I remember again until I get to tell a newly pregnant friend to be forewarned. 

***So fyi I'm in a contest for the 25 Top Mom Blogs of NY- I would SO appreciate your vote ONLY a 10 days left. You don't have to give any personal info just click the button:

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